Old guard leather mistress seeks personal submissive

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One of the ways they ified their belonging to the sub-culture was in wearing leather - such as motorcycle leathers, as well as chaps and leather strap harnesses, and of course leather boots. The fact that there were so many returned servicemen amongst the 'Old Guard' which meant that their background influenced the high discipline, training and protocol tradition that a of them extolled and practised.

While for others amongst them, BDSM was about getting pleasure and getting off, with less formality and more clubbing. It is often said that there emerged something of a generational and cultural divide, between the Old Guard and the younger generation.

Knowing what you want. Formal and disciplined, or informal and playful? For those pursuing FemDom relationships, these considerations remain relevant. Are you wanting your own FemDom relationship to be quite formal, strict, clear roles, with discipline and respect? Or are you wanting a FemDom relationship which is less formal, with more joking around and skipping casually into play, and only being in "role" for playtime and events and that be the basis of what you train your partner for, and after orgasm the play is over and roles dropped?

Or by all means a different nuanced understanding which fits neither of these.

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If only the world could be so clear about their desires! It's lovely though that their legacy lives on in their writings, their role and contribution to BDSM, and the changes to society in respect of LGBTQ rights and more awareness and inclusiveness. Training your dragon slave : slave positions, protocol, training and reinforcement One of the other major areas of FemDom relationships is that of slave training.

This area owes much to an area known as "classical conditioning", which came out of experiments and writing such as the famous Pavlov's dogs.

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Ring a bell, feed dogs a morsel of meat, and the dogs will over time begin to salivate in advance in anticipation of the food coming. Knowledge of classical conditioning and behaviour modification is very helpful to training slaves. It is a common discipline of dog training books to include discipline, rewards and punishment, amongst training strategies for reinforcement of behaviour, alongside the use of tools such as collars. However one of the best in my view authors on the use of animal training reinforcement and "shaping", is Karen Pryor, who was a former head dolphin trainer at Sea Life Park.

She advocates an approach which is responsive to the individual psychology of the animal you're working with, and their individual behavioral responses - including those which are idiosyncratic and unexpected. Essentially, one can use lessons from dog and dolphin training psychology and practices, to train one's submissive or slave.

I've synthesised these practices into three areas: slave training to reinforce desired behaviourslave shaping teach old dogs new tricks, as it were, winkand how to un-train annoying behaviour yes you can thank me later. Within the class, I also seek to provide ideas and inspiration as to what you might want to train your submissive to do. What's going to please you? A glass of your favourite wine presented to you on arrival home after work? A bath run to the perfect temperature with bath salts? A foot massage done perfectly the way you like?

Oral sex performed the way you like? What's important to you? Respect shown in particular ways? Giving you your space at specified times when you need? Devotion and consideration towards you displayed in thoughtful ways?

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Or something else? To know their place? To know how to please you? To get their fetish "fix" every now and again? To get respite from being in charge, or counter-balance to their work responsibilities and role? Managing masochists and the fantasy of a Venus in Furs. One of the most common confusions I see as a Dominatrix and BDSM educator and consultant, is a woman who has a partner who presents as a submissive but is actually a masochist.

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What's the difference? Well people often mistakenly think that a masochist is someone who's into pain, and that's partly true but it's not the whole truth. Some of the differences in my view between a true "submissive" and a "masochist" is the following with some sweeping generalization for lack of space to Old guard leather mistress seeks personal submissive into it in too much complexity or depth in a short blog post. A submissive - wants to please you, and gets gratification from knowing they've pleased you.

Is typically very grateful to their Dominant. They may be anxious to know whether they've disappointed you in any way, or if you're displeased with them, following play. They are generally happy to go along with most of what you want, to make you happy. They want to learn how they can please you. A masochist - will want specific activities that Old guard leather mistress seeks personal submissive are into, and will often try and prescribe and script the play they want. They will often send you or leave out particular material as guides or hints to what they want done to them.

They will have particular fetishes and fantasies they want fulfilled. They can be grumpy and complaining and negative if they don't get their way, or you disappoint their desires of what they envisaged. In their fantasy, the woman is above them and just out of reach, and is cold towards them and punishes them cruelly and her investment in punishing them shows that she is invested enough to bother spending time and energy on them.

However she must seem above them and a bit out-of-reach, and too much proximity and familiarity will result in them devaluing her and getting bored. The term masochist comes from an author named Leopold von Sacher-Masoch who wrote the novella 'Venus in Furs', based on his fantasy desires for a beautiful cold woman to punish him cruelly, wearing furs which was his fetishand to demand he a contract to be her slave, and later cuckold him - sleeping with another man.

The psychology is that of an inverted narcissist who wants his ego squished down, through cold punishment and humiliation, but is feeding off the attention that she cares enough to bother doing so. After dominating, he will inevitably complain or have some negativity that you didn't do something "right", ie the way he wants.

Sacher-Masoch was in real life a masochist, and tried to get exactly this fantasy from his mistress or wife, throughout his life. It is the woman who too often ends up tortured by the masochist, feeling like a failure at dominating him. So if you're reading this - and in this situation - know that it's the masochist, and not you!

So how does one deal with this? It seems an impossible situation - no? It need not be. There are a range of strategies I recommend and discuss in my class, but among these and as "Cliff notes" summary, include: a Expectation management - setting expectations low, not promising play and then them getting annoyed if you can't execute on it due to a commitment clash, tiredness, illness or any other reason.

You will need other people, friends in your life, you will help fill needs that your masochist living so much in their fantasy - won't be able to meet. Whatever your masochist has a fetish for - be it leather, or boots, or whatever, - if you periodically and unpredictably wear them at your own whim, it will have them go into ga-ga land. And you can grant them some gratification, or deny them to torment them if they've been badly behaved. However don't get into a predictable pattern that will result in expectation that you're going to wear the thing so that it becomes onerous on you, or boring and predictable for them.

It can basically feel like you are in a psychological chess game, if you're with a masochist. The benefits? A masochist will tend to be very loyal to their Mistress if she is meeting their masochistic desires and is on the horse above themand if you can manage a masochist - you can manage anything in life. And if you have a submissive, rather than a masochist, who just wants to please you? Ah well then you're going to have a much easier time. As they're all about pleasing you. My goodness how time flies.

I have received so much positive feedback from those who have done the course, and their close friends observing them, that their confidence has increased, their knowledge and way they walk and hold themselves, which is lovely to hear. Happy dominating and training your partner s to your pleasure, and practising Mistressery over all areas of your life.

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Or are they masochists? Posted on July 20, What a Slave Needs: personal view by slave david stein Posted on July 06, Comfortable Dominatrix fetish attire - An oxymoron?

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Posted on March 01, The tradition of FemDom afternoon or "high" tea Posted on February 07, Cart: 0. This is part 2 of a two series blog I wrote for Passionfruit Sensuality Shop. Above: Vintage photograph of Masoch with Fanny Pistor It is the woman who too often ends up tortured by the masochist, feeling like a failure at dominating him.

Old guard leather mistress seeks personal submissive

email: [email protected] - phone:(260) 697-9177 x 9170

The Old Guard History, Origins and Traditions